How The Grinch [Almost] Stole Your Business
Every Worker down Workville liked customers a lot,
But the Grinch who neighboured Workville did not!
The Grinch hated customers! The whole customer logic!
Now, please don’t ask why. The answer is quite tragic.
It could be, perhaps, that there was a hole in his pocket.
It could be he got electrocuted by a broken socket.
But the most likely reason, if you must dare,
May have been because his wallet was too bare.
But, whatever the reason, his wallet or the corkers,
He stood watching bustling custom, hating the Workers.
Staring down from his run-down, shoddy trade,
With a frightful frown that wouldn’t ever fade.
For he knew every Worker on Workville Street,
Was busy earning money on their tiresome feet.
“As they’re busy dealing with complaints,” he snarled with a sneer
“I will be relaxing, watching football and drinking a beer!”
Then he grunted, with his Grinch fingers anxiously drumming,
“I must find a way to keep their customers from coming!
Why for twenty-three years I’ve put up with this now!
I must stop their customers from coming! But how?”
Then he got a solution! A hideous solution!
The Grinch got a brilliant, hideous solution!
“I know what to do!” The Grinch grumbled on his own.
“I’ll remove every Workville telephone.
And when tomorrow the Workers wake to not a thing,
Their customers will reign The Grinch as the Outlet King!”
At ten to dawn, when all the Workers were snug in bed,
The Grinch got dressed, packed his tools and fled!
All of the Workers were wrapped up fast asleep,
When the Grinch packed his van without a peep,
He packed it up with their telephones, their stocks,
Their hustle and their bustle, their snippets and flocks!
Once the van was filled to the very top,
He rode with his load to scrap behind the shop!
“Boo-hoo to the workers!” the Grinch was humming.
“They will be finding out now that no customers are coming!”
The Grinch was watching, impatiently waiting while tapping his foot.
“The Workers will cry when they see their customers have got shot.
That will be a joyful sound,” smiled the Grinch, “I simply must hear!”
The Grinch remained quiet as he put a hand to his ear.
And he didn’t hear a noise, a sound, or a rumble!
The Grinch was surprised that he didn’t hear a mumble!
For every business from Workville, the young and the old,
Were still working away to keep their business uphold.
Every business in Workville had heard of alldayPA telephone answering services,
So their customers could continue to make enquiries and purchases!
The Grinch hadn’t stopped customers from coming! They still came!
Somehow or other, every Workville customer still came.
And the Grinch, with his grinch arm on his knee,
Sat pondering and pondering. “How could this be?”
Maybe customers, he thought, cannot be bought from a store.
Maybe customers, perhaps, expect a little bit more!
And what happened next? Well, in Workville they say,
That the Grinch customer tolerance grew that day!
He dialled alldayPA within an instant,
And enquired about services for a virtual assistant.
The Grinch returned each and every stolen good,
Because with his virtual PA his customers knew where they stood.
With a customer service you cannot knock,
His customers could now contact him around the clock!